Monday, 8 December 2014

OAK TREE

I am an oak tree. 
I am large, solid. 
Quercus. Astonishing really, I am a little quirky. 
My wood is hard, strong. 
I am resistant to attack by parasites, so I am so infinitely useful. 
Easily recognisable, I stand out of the crowd. 
I am a symbol of endurance. 
Infinite complexity has shaped my years of enduring. 
My roots dig deep into the earth, 
searching, gathering further complexity and aiding in my growth. 
I hardly need watering. I can stand on my own. 
And yet,
you wouldn't choose an oak to adorn your garden.
You would choose something more delicate,
a birch maybe, or a flower that will die the first time temperatures soar. 
At the end of the day,
strength and endurance are not what people want in their gardens.
They want a waif like, weak tree they have to nurture, invest in, take infinite care of. 
I stand, I wait. 

I burn with the same intensity when flames lick my limbs,
I break along the same lines as other woods. 
My leaves rage in the storm the same as other trees. 
I just reliably stand the morning after. 
I don't want to be a fragile flower, 
or a birch tree that dies in the Australian climate. 
But I do want to adorn a special garden. 
I wait, and endure, as is customary for me. 
Another season, another year. 



Thursday, 10 October 2013

Well, I know I have said this before, but I will say it again. Medical school was easy when you compare it to parenting.
Medicine is predictable and there are soooooo many books written about it.
Parenting is just you not trying to fuck up in the areas your parents did and try other things instead!!!!
I know that kids separating from you is a normal part of growing up, but nevertheless, it feels like a loss.
I used to be the main thing in their life. I used to show them the world. Now I just stand back while they explore it without me. It is a small death.
Never was meant to be easy, I know that. I just wish I was more equipped for it. I still feel like a child myself so often, I don't know who to turn to for help and support, and I don't know if the strategies I am using have any relevance at all. Their dad is flawed (aren't we all!!!!!) and  he is not helpful when it comes to development and normal. Because, hey, he thinks he's normal.
Am I making them into normal people? Am I hurting them? I hope not. This is my magna opus.

Mistakes, missteps and assets

 We all make so many mistakes in life. Miscalculations in finances, relationships, job choices and even careers. We stuff up in parenting an...